National Lost Socks Memorial Day Redux

Today is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. Who knows what exactly is splitting up your beloved foot coverings? Laundry bag? Washing Machine? Dryer? Alien creature socknapping? Hard to know (because if you did, you wouldn’t have lost your sock, now would you?). But whatever caused it, the sock is missing and you are left with its lonely mate.

Whatever may have led to the disappearance, this is the day to give it up. Turn the remaining sock into a dust rag or better yet a sock puppet with googly eyes that frightens the cat. Or maybe bury it in the back yard next to your beloved former pet hamster. Let it go. Your lost sock is not coming back. Face reality. Time to move on and not hang onto hope for its return.

There will be other socks. Walmart probably has a sale on new socks you will come to love nearly as much as your missing foot wrapper. Your shoes won’t mind. Shoes are notoriously unsentimental anyway. So get over it. Today is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. Take a photo of the remaining sock and post it on social media with the hashtag #LostSockMemorialDay. For goodness sakes get on with your life. Wherever it may be, it is likely stinky anyway. Sorry. But it needed to be said.

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